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Saturday



BACK ON TRACK

Sorry about that interruption, the old Compac finally imploded and we had to re-equip. You wouldn't want to know: The one Saturday when equine advice fails to greet the blogosphere's starter, Magic Mick's tip of the day Reactive flew home to pay $46 for $10 and my carefully researched special Magical Miss coughed up $70 for the Lawson.
Spare a thought for colleague, Geelong Advertiser sports editor and Collingwood supporter Andrew Meath. He of little faith got involved in some dodgy quarter-by-quarter betting scheme operating on last night's Collingwood-Port Adelaide final and, convinced the Magpies didn't have a chance, bet solidly in favour of the Power. Down $500, we hear. That's before costs for damages to the TV screen.
Now, for Mick's specials at Flemington:
Try Great Glen (Race 2, No.1) each-way and Auckland Blues (Race 3, No.5) each-way. For value It's Platonic (Race 6, No.13) could run a very cheeky race in the Craiglee Stakes and look for improvement from Thong Classic in (Race 9, No.2).
A couple of footy points from Mick that are worth pondering:
1) No Buckley...are Collingwood better off without him ? 2) And the arrogance of Mark Williams again bites him in the bum.


Friday



HUMAN WRONGS

Colonel Gaddafi's son, Seif al-Islam, says it's only right and proper that Libya heads the UN's Human Rights Commission from next year because, wait for it, Libya has a lousy record in human rights.
THE BBC reports that Seif al-Islam Gaddafi supported the move for his country to head the UN Commission on the unusual grounds that Libya had a bad human rights record.
"We have a bad record regarding human rights in this region in general... not just Libya but in all the Third (World) countries and in particular in the Middle East," he said.
"It's a good time now to have a country from this region in that position because... it's an embarrassment to those countries because they are violating the human rights.
"We can work with this commission to enhance the situation of the human rights in the Middle East," he added.

Hey this could catch on: Tim Blair to take over News Diary; Yasser Arafat to lead the service at the Jerusalem synagogue; and yes, I'm volunteering to head the Geelong chapter of the Rechabites.



THE WONDERS OF THE ACADEMIC MIND

PROFESSOR BUNYIP has an exquisite gotcha today on The Age. One of the paper's dunderlings surveyed the opinion of one Dr Irene Donohoue Clyne to get the mail on how wretched life is for Muslims since a bunch of crazed Saudis killed 3000 innocents by aeroplane in the name of Allah. Bells rang at the Bunyip Billablog and it turns out Dr Irene is either a witless hypocrite or a slave to Islamic misogamy. Neither condition sits well with the inmates of Melbourne University where the doc dispenses her wisdom. Seems it's perfectly acceptable at The Age.


Thursday


NOT THAT BAD

I've just found a copy of a story my father told me a few years back which had been told to him by his father. It dates back to the turn of the 20th century and illustrates the complex social strata of rural Australian communities at that time as well as displaying the bush irony that prevailed.

Terrick Rose was an elder of the Framlingham Aboriginal community based in the Warrnambool district in southwest Victoria. He was well liked and respected and regularly travelled to Warrnambool to raise funds for the welfare and education of his people.
Every Sunday he waited outside St Joseph's Church for Mass to finish, knowing that he could rely on a few donations from the Irish-Catholic farming community.
One Sunday he was waiting at the back of the chuch, where the menfolk congregated after Mass for a smoke and a chat, dressed as usual in his neat blue suit.
Out of nowhere, a visiting senior priest appeared, unhappy to see someone loitering at the back of the church while Mass was celebrated inside.
"Who are you?'' he demanded. Terrick politely identified himself.
"Are you Catholic?''
"Blimey,'' replied Terrick. "It's hard enough being a Blackfella.''



Flying feline

A couple have sued Air Canada for $5 million, claiming the airline lost their tabby cat during a flight from Canada to California. CNN says Andrew Wysotski and Lori Learmont, formerly of Oshawa, Ontario, traveled to San Francisco with their 15-year-old cat, Fu, and four other cats last August.
They claim Air Canada, its cargo-handling company and San Francisco International Airport personnel are guilty of negligence, negligent infliction of emotional distress, fraud and false advertising.
"It's not about the money," Wysotski said. "It's more the attention to the problem than the money."

So they'll settle for $100 costs and an apology? And pigs might fly. Er not by Air Canada, they won't.





GRAVE OVERSIGHT

For someone who commands $100,000 to spruik at gabfests, Bill Clinton has to be the commander-in-chief of tight arses.THE MOBILE REGISTER reports that that ole cigar-sniffer has welshed on an agreement to pay $20 for the upkeep of his great-granddaddy's grave.
George W. Cassady, Clinton's maternal great-grandfather, died in 1886, and Cassady's wife, Josephine, died in 1920. They are among the 50 to 75 people buried in the cemetery maintained by Pleasant Grove Baptist Church in Loango, a Covington County community of about 700 residents, said Pete Lowe, chairman of the church's cemetery committee.
In 1999, the church, which maintains two cemeteries, began sending requests for $20 donations to families with members buried in the cemeteries. It has sent out requests each year since then. The nation's 42nd chief executive was among those to whom letters were sent in 1999, 2000 and 2002, Lowe says. No request was sent to Clinton in 2001 because church members were uncertain of Clinton's address after he left the presidency.
Lynda Dixon of the Clinton Presidential Foundation in Little Rock, Ark., said she spoke with Clinton when he was in Arkansas in July and he said he would like to help the church, but he needed something in writing.
Lowe says the church has sent Clinton requests by mail and fax. Clinton aides say they had no record of such requests being received until last month.


Wednesday



GOT AN OPENER?

The New Zealand Human Rights Commission has received a complaint from a backpacker about a sign in a bar that said "We don't serve women,...
According to STUFF NATION the sign in the Charleston Tavern continued: "...you have to bring your own".
Tavern proprietor Michael Moss said he was nonplussed when he received a call last Friday from someone claiming to represent the commission.
"I thought it was someone taking the piss out of me. On Monday I rang them and said, was it really them that rang me? They said 'Yes, have you taken the sign down yet'?"
The commission decided to take no action.
Pity. Bad jokes like that should be punished.



TRYING TO BE NICE

From Nury Vittachi's delightful Travellers Tales in the Far Eastern Economic Review we learn of the utterly stupid Chinese first-time air traveller who decided he needed to have a good spit.
Not wanting to eject a yucky gob of spittle on the nice aircraft-cabin carpet, he headed for the door of the China Southern Airlines aircraft. His plan was to spit out of the plane, which had just taken off from Shenzhen, in the south of the country, on a flight to Shanghai. The passenger had succeeded in opening an inner protective plate and was attempting to turn the handle of the emergency door when another passenger spotted him and restrained him, the local press reported. "I just wanted to spit," the passenger told the horrified crew.



HOME SICK

TV bosses are making the sickest reality show, literally, with contestants trying to get as many illnesses as possible.
In Sick Day, three Pommy blokes will live in the same house for two months and try to catch ailments like nits, lice, flu, venereal diseases and warts.
Reminds me of a residence I shared in my wild youth.


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